ACTUAL CLASSIFIED ADS
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
We build bodies that last a lifetime.
For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to- find person.
3-year-old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go
anywhere again.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and
salary.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.